Ah, Clover needles. I hardly knew you. Turns out I’m out of practice on what cats do and do not consider nummy nibbly treats.
A lot, really.
Please note there is some cussing, so put in your headphones if you’re at work.
Please also note this video does not pass the Bechdel Test.
It’s below 50, I think that means it’s OK to start bringing out the wool.
I was just thinking last night about all the things in my life I have such affection for and would not have if it were not for the internet. Here is a partial list:
1. I might have learned to knit, but I probably wouldn’t have stuck with it without the access to thousands of patterns and all the yarn that’s out there and all the people I’ve met.
2. I wouldn’t have met my knitting group without the internet.
3. I wouldn’t have met my friend Terri, which means I wouldn’t have gotten into Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
4. I wouldn’t have met my friend Beth, which means I wouldn’t have gotten into Firefly.
5. I wouldn’t have learned how to spin because I wouldn’t have had such easy access to supplies, online tutorials and I probably wouldn’t have wanted the yarn anyways because my knitting probably would have tapered off long before I wanted to learn how to spin.
6. I wouldn’t have Cards Against Humanity or Munchkin, which are two of my favorite card games.
7. I wouldn’t have half the comic collection I have, because I never would have heard of Girl Genius, Buffy, Least I Could Do, Questionable Content, etc.
8. I probably would never cook or bake, because I wouldn’t have all these recipes and pictures tempting me and telling me that they need to be made.
9. I wouldn’t have my kickass Kitchenaid mixer (thanks, Mom!) because I wouldn’t be interested in cooking.
10. I’d still think popcorn should be made in the microwave and not on the stovetop.
11. I wouldn’t have nearly the amount of friends I have. The internet has made it so much easier to reach out to people who are interested in the same things I am, but aren’t necessarily in my normal social circles. I’ve met so many people from Twitter who I would never have run into on my own.
12. I wouldn’t have met my friend Pam, because I would never have read her blog and realized she was out there for me to
corrupt show her fun new things like Doctor Who, Dr. Horrible, beer, etc.
13. I probably still wouldn’t like beer, because I might still have only been exposed to Miller Lite.
14. I wouldn’t have watched Sherlock because Tumblr wouldn’t have been there to taunt me with a million gifs.
15. My reading and understanding of Jane Austen novels would probably still only be on a surface level, without having access to resources like JASNA.
16. I would only have met one of my ex-boyfriends–I only met one of them offline.
17. My musical tastes would be restricted to only what’s on the radio, because that’s all that I would be able to hear.
18. It would have taken me a lot longer to realize that people who enjoy my particular brand of weirdness are out there and I’d probably still be where I was in high school and my early 20s–trying to fit in.
19. I wouldn’t have any of my Kevin Smith movies, Buddy Christ doll or inappropriate lines to bust out because I’d never have met my ex who introduced me to Clerks.
20. I wouldn’t have food from Trader Joe’s in my cabinets, IKEA furniture to covet or access to so many of the stores and restaurants here in Kansas City, because they probably wouldn’t have come if people hadn’t used the internet to tell these companies that they are wanted here.
Please note I came up with this list just by looking around my living room. If I were to walk around in here and physically eliminate everything I think I wouldn’t have if it weren’t for the internet, my apartment would be looking bare and quite sad.